I recently had a conversation with a guy I knew would have some insights to share about navigating relationships and ensuring men and women are speaking the same language.
Here are the highlights from our talk:
Believe it or not, guys are not mind readers.
Mr.XY says “we don’t like to, don’t want to, and most of all don’t need to play games to figure out what’s wrong in our relationships. ”
Why should you care? Well… women, as a whole, tend to want a man who can be attentive enough to take hints and figure out
(a) that something is wrong and
(b) what they did to contribute or cause the situation.
Don’t believe me? How many women have left a chore undone determined not to ask their guy to do it. They don’t want to “have to nag,” they want the man to identify that it needs to be done and then do it. Dishes piling up in the sink? Trash need to be taken out? Lawn need to be mowed? Fill in your own blank here -_______________.
Avoid a Lover’s Spat – Just say what’s on your mind! (Photo credit: Pretty Poo Eater)
According to Mr. XY, we’re wasting our time.
“Let me save you the trouble of dropping hints – we don’t know we’re doing something wrong or we probably wouldn’t be doing it.”
Save some time and angst and just spell it out. “I’m mad at you b/c… Or I need you to do X…” He’ll be much more likely to listen and fix whatever the issue is.
According to my source: “It’s not that we don’t care, we’re just too stupid to realize we messed up.”
It’s radical, but it just might work. Give it a shot and just spell it out. See if things go smoother in your relationship. Then let me know!
My ReaLIZation 